A study released yesterday by the American Institute of Mental Health concluded that 97% of women are unable to view men as anything more than objects existing solely for their own personal gain.
Chief among the explosive 52-page report’s findings is a telling segment of one-on-one interviews conducted by study administrator Martha Winger. “My team was not shocked by the overall results,” said Winger. “Yet, hearing firsthand accounts the specific ways in which women continue to undervalue and degrade men on a daily basis was quite disturbing.”
Study participants, including 231 straight women and 33 gay men who are practically women, offered the following documented testimonials:
I work in an office where men wear suits and ties and, let me tell you, having to look at that shit makes me want to whip out my big, ballpoint pen and sign a 30-year mortgage with every single one of those fiscally-fit motherfuckers.
When I’m on a train packed with dudes, all I see are hundreds of shoulders that I could cry into and wipe my snot on after a stressful day at work.
Sometimes I’ll just walk really closely behind guys in shorts if they have nice legs. A man with a beefy bottom half could easily support our three kids trying to hang off his body while he’s cooking me dinner.
Winger hopes that the study will expose a growing challenge in the mental health field. “We need to begin to get into the minds of these women and start to change some of these destructive thought patterns and behaviors. Until we make some progress on that front, I just don’t see how men can feel safe anywhere in this country.”